Speaker 1: 0:00

Hey there, hey there. Today we're going to discuss how our children react at different ages and what they specifically need from us. Each developmental stage brings unique challenges, especially under the strain of parental separation. Recognizing these can help us support our children more effectively. Understanding developmental stages is extremely important if your goal is effective discipline. Children grow and change rapidly, and their cognitive, emotional and social capabilities evolve with them. What works for a toddler probably isn't effective for a teenager. Misaligned expectations can lead to frustration for both parents and children, making discipline counterproductive. By tailoring your approach to your child's developmental stage, you can achieve better communication, understanding and, ultimately, a more peaceful household, something all parents need.

Speaker 1: 0:52

Let's start with the youngest group toddlers. During the toddler years, rapid development occurs. Newfound motor skills and emerging language abilities are exciting, but also bring challenges such as temper, tantrums and impatience. Ensuring your home is safe for exploration is crucial. Simple steps like securing furniture and locking cabinets can prevent accidents. Communication between co-parents is key, especially about routines such as eating, sleeping and milestones like potty training. Remember, toddlers struggle to articulate their feelings, leading to frustration. Instead of reacting to tantrums with frustration, a calm time out in a safe place can teach them to self-soothe. This approach fosters emotional regulation skills, beneficial for both the child and the parent.

Speaker 1: 1:40

Moving on to the next stage, we have preschoolers. Preschoolers show more emotional control, are curious, eager to learn and start forming real friendships. However, separation anxiety can surface, especially with the changes parental separation brings. It's a time to nurture their independence while offering the security they crave, engage in their play, listen to their stories and show patience as they navigate these changes. Establishing consistent routines between both homes provides a sense of stability, essential for their well-being. Discipline should be consistent and gentle. Use positive reinforcement to encourage good behavior and set clear, understandable limits. Dietary habits and sleep routines remain extremely important for their development.

Speaker 1: 2:29

Next, let's discuss school-age children, from about six to nine. As children enter school age, their world expands significantly. They develop academically and socially and begin to explore new interests. This growth requires our active participation and encouragement. Being present at school functions and extracurricular activities sends a powerful message of support. It's also a stage when discipline evolves. Balancing positive reinforcement with appropriate consequences, like limiting screen time, can help guide their behavior. This age is perfect for fostering responsibility and independence, from personal hygiene to household chores. Keeping lines of communication open about expectations and achievements between both homes supports their development and adaptability.

Speaker 1: 3:16

Now let's talk about tweens, kids aged from 10 to 12. Tweens navigate the challenging terrain between childhood and adolescence. Their interests vary widely from toys one day to social media influencers the next. It's a period of rapid change, both physically and emotionally. Parental supervision and guidance become crucial, especially online. Establishing rules for technology use, such as charging devices in a common area, can help manage their screen time and ensure they get enough rest. It's also a time for open discussions about body image and self-esteem, as they start to notice and compare themselves with peers and media representations. Maintaining an environment of acceptance and understanding at home helps them navigate these changes confidently.

Speaker 1: 3:58

Lastly, let's talk about the teenage years, between 13 and 18. The teenage years are filled with milestones, driving, dating and perhaps their first job. These are exciting times, but also moments when they need guidance to manage new responsibilities wisely. Emotional maturity begins to stabilize as they grow, but it's closely tied to how they handle responsibilities and freedoms. Linking privileges to responsible behavior encourages them to adopt mature attitudes toward their duties and relationships. This stage is also about preparing them for the adult world teaching them about healthy relationships, self-care and financial literacy. Encourage open conversations about their hopes, fears and dreams for the future. Across all of these stages, it's important to remember that every child is unique. Parental separation affects children differently, and being attuned to their individual responses is key to providing the support they need. Thanks for listening. Next week we'll start doing a deep dive into some wonderful discipline resources, beginning with the book Parenting with Love and Logic.